A Year Already?

I have to stop putting off writing a blog-post, don’t I? Well, I am going to warn you now: this blog post will be ridiculously terrible, as I’m unsure of what to say, I will, however, try my best to make it at least okay to read! Promise! Maybe.

I’ve made a lot of friends, but also some enemies, since last year. 14^th of February, 2012, the first time I commented on Derek’s blog. It has got to be one of the best decisions I have ever made. And I am not just saying that. It really has to be.

I can’t really remember how things were, back then, not completely. The memories are a little fuzzy, but warm too; the kind of warmth radiated by kindness and love.

You guys were all so nice to me, as soon as I commented. You didn’t know a thing about me, but you were lovely. All of you were so nice to me. It was a little weird, for me, having people being nice to me, because they’re good people. Most people are nice to me, because they want something. Whether it’s money, knowledge or wanting to use me… But you guys were different, from the start.
Within moments, I felt safe amongst you all.

Happiness isn’t exactly a common emotion for me. Usually it’s hyper, not happiness. Though, there are those odd moments, when I look at Blogland, when I look at the people I can call a friend, when I look at what I’ve overcome this last year, I’ll smile and, for once, be truly happy. Because, my life is so much better now I have Blogland, now I have friends, now that I have all of you.

I have to admit, I’ve caused a lot of havoc in Blogland, with how argumentative I am, and my depressive mood-swings and my anger issues and… Yeah, I’m a bit of a nuisance in Blogland. And, for that, I apologize.

Writing this is much more difficult than I had anticipated, I’ve got slow music on and I want to cry because I have serious feels for this fandom and I love you all so much.
I don’t think words can truly express the love I have for Skuttlebugs, and I will never be able to repay you all for how amazing you are and how much you’ve helped me, just by being yourselves.

I could go on forever about how important you all are, but I’ll have to go for dinner soon and I doubt I’ll be able to continue blogging after, so I’m going to cut this a lot shorter than I had wanted it to be.

Blogland Awards, Gift for the Golden God, Kingdom of the Wicked release, my 16^th, Christmas 2012 and New Year, I feel like I’ve been through a hell of a lot with you guys.

I think it’s safe to say, my 16^th birthday was the best birthday I’ve ever had. I was so happy when I got all these e-mails from you guys and people staying up until midnight with me to wish me a happy birthday. And, I can’t forget how even Derek wished me a happy birthday! 18^th of November 2012 was one of the best days of my life, thank you all for being so amazing that day and every other day.

 

Zath, Sparky, Lynxia, Mara - thank you so much for being there when no-one else was, I don’t think I could’ve made it through this last year without you. You all make me smile, just by being happy. And you’re all so incredibly talented. You’re the best friends I could ever have asked for and I adore you for it. Please, don’t lose hope.

Rim – rainbows. That’s all you’re getting.

Star – you’re my Yorkshire buddy, where’d I be without you? No-one would understand me when I went all broad Yorkshire n’ stuff. Only Yorkshire people understand when I say “’ey up, nah then, thee’” and it’s just the best. Your name is probably one of the best fitting – you really are a star, you light up everyone’s faces. Thank you for that.

Val V. – You been working on that Irish accent? We can’t have a Skulduggery film without the perfect Valkyrie, can we? Val, you’re really funny and I always feel that I can be myself around you! You’re as insane as I am, and I love that about you! You’re a collector, too, and I love finding out when you get new books so I can scream with you because collecting is so much fun! You’re truly one of a kind and I love you for how awesome you are! WORK ON THAT IRISH ACCENT.

Cain - Ninja Aussie Stalker. Need I say more? You’re awesomely amazing and always know how to make me smile. And I can scream with you about the Australian Skulduggery books – it’s glorious.

Eve – You’re insane. I hope you know that. You’re amazingly wonderful, and you come up with the best nicknames in the world! You’re so cheerful and perfect and awh. You’re amazing, okay!?

Nix – I left you pretty late on in this list of messages for a reason; you puzzle me. You’re such a good friend, person and a good person to oppose. Might sound stupid, but I love arguing with you – you’re a worthy opponent. You’re awesome and I’ll really need your help if the Blogland Awards are going to work this year! Plus, I sometimes do need bringing down a peg or two, you’re definitely someone I can trust to put me back in my place.

Lav – I could swear your heart is made of gold and you’re made of diamonds; you’re so precious and worth so much more than I think you believe. I’m honoured to call you a friend, because, despite your talents and abilities, you’re so down to earth and kind. It’s always great having that one person who will be nice to you no matter what; you’re like that with almost everyone. You seem to have some sort of gift.

Ember – LOVE YOU. I honestly can’t think of much to say to you, you’re just so perfect!

Death – we might’ve started off on the wrong foot, but that means nothing. It’s in the past, and you’re my sister okay? I love you to pieces and I’ll be here if you ever need me!

Everyone else – I feel like this is just a list of messages to people and it’ll go on forever if I don’t stop now, so…. I love you all, even those of you I don’t particularly like. Don’t lose hope; be brave.

Oh, and Flame – I’m not going to forget you. You’re too hot! Seriously, though, you’re insanely nice, funny, clever, down to earth and, just, perfect. I’ll always be here for you, and I miss our little gossip sessions (I feel so out of the loop!).

February 14^th 2012 was a great day, for me, and I couldn’t be more thankful for that day. Looking back, just over a year later, I don’t regret commenting at all. It was one of the best choices I ever made – I hope I can meet some of you in real life, one day, and attack you with hugs and skittles and rainbow dust and screech with you all about books!

I’m not sure what you guys think of me, but I know what I think of all of you. It’s more what I know I guess… I know that you’re the best friends I could ever have wished for.

I can honestly say: Blogland makes me feel like I belong. Blogland is my safe place, it’s like a second home; it’s perfect – just like all of you.

 

 

Oh, and for those of you that were wondering what a complete collection of UK editions of Skulduggery Pleasant books look like, here:

 

 

 

 

                                      You’re my dandelions in the spring,

MEH

Well, this is the first dedication I have written since last year… And it’s been almost a year since I’ve been here, in Blogland. It’s over a year, however, since I’ve been active in this fandom. A year and a couple of months, I believe. Since I made my page (Skulduggery Pleasant Magic Vs. Magic) November of 2011.

Wow, long time ago…

Time seems to go so quickly when you’re having fun. And, despite not always having fun, Blogland is the most fun, safe, enjoyable, funny, beautiful place I have ever been. The Blogland community may only be small and we all have our problems, but not once has that stopped you all from being welcoming towards me and many others.
I never used to think anyone would like me; I used to be convinced that I was ugly, I used to hate myself more than anyone and, still, I sometimes do.

Blogland is almost like a place of healing. It’s a place of acceptance and freedom of speech (most of the time), Blogland has suffered some great losses in the past, but still it stands. Like a star in the sky, still burning brightly.

Blogland isn’t a place, not really. Blogland can be wherever you want it to be. Under the sea, in the sky, in the middle of London, New York, Canberra or Dublin! Blogland is not a particular place, but it is everywhere. Everywhere, including my heart.

Blogland has been there for me over the past year (ish) more than most people. I don’t have very many “real” friends, because I lack social skills. I often find myself to have insulted someone by accident, and my moodswings aren’t the most helpful… Oh and there’s the fact that once deemed ugly by society, there’s almost no coming back from that. However, Blogland is different. Blogland is full of life, even when dying.

Blogland is full of surprises and there’s never really a dull day. Blogfights, arguments, laughs, gossiping, romances… It’s like a fairy-tale. Except, it’s real. You’re all real people, the things that are going on in our lives are real and the friendships between us are probably more real than people that already know each-other. So, I partially dedicate to Blogland. Blogland is nothing without Bloglandians – keep that in mind.

 

I’m finding this really difficult to write, because, if I could, I’d be writing everyone their own little dedication. Because everyone deserves to know that they’re loved.

Instead, I guess I’ll just carry on typing and see where this goes… It’s nowhere near as good as anything else I’ve ever written, because I feel a tad ropey and, most of the time, when I write dedications I’m really emotional AND MAKE EVERYONE CRY. I’ll try, though.

I think, the rest of my dedication will go to magic.

Not magic like in Skulduggery, or Percy Jackson, or Harry Potter or anything like that. And certainly not magic as in the final line of Skulduggery Pleasant that just causes floods of feels that fans constantly drown in.

No, I’m dedicating to real magic.

I’ve probably lost some of you, haven’t I? Magic is whatever you want it to be. It’s all around us. Magic is everything and anything, or nothing at all. It’s down to belief.

Personally, I believe magic is what all of you are. The way that you can smile despite what is going on in your lives, the fact that you keep fighting despite it being a losing battle, in the eyes of most. The way none of you give up that anything is possible. Because, really, anything is possible.

You’ve all proven that odds are just some numbers. It’s almost impossible that I’m alive, according to the odds. Odds are odds, not facts. The odds that this will be good are incredibly low, but I could surprise us all. Odds are stupid, you’ve shown me that. I didn’t realise how lucky I was to be alive until I met all of you.

Despite staring death straight in the eyes, I thought life was stupid. I still often find myself in that horrid place where death seems like the only friend you have. There are very, very few things that get me out of that place. And, surprisingly enough, my family isn’t one of them. Blogland, however, is. Blogland is there for me when no-one else is and, to me, that’s magic.

It’s magic, to me, that I can have friends, that I can smile and actually sometimes catch a glimpse of myself in a mirror and not hate myself, it’s magic that people actually care for me.

Magic isn’t just fiction, to me. Magic is friends and family. And, really, you’re the best family I could ever have.

 

I’ll never be able to thank you enough, for the way you’ve shown me there are good things in life, and how to smile and laugh, taught me that even I’m pretty (sort of), shown me other ways of life and made me a better person, all around. Oh, and saved me from myself more times than I can count.

 

So, I dedicate to magic and to Blogland. Because Blogland is magical.

 

Also, I dedicate to the perfection that is Maralie Lily Charm; she’s more beautiful than I could ever wish to be, with a heart of gold and a smile brighter than the sun is, she’s truly amazing.