"Dedications~ I haven’t dedicated in what feels like forever. Time goes by so quickly…It feels like just yesterday I stared at the comments section in Blogland…Wanting myself to say something, but not finding the courage to talk to the awesome Minions that dwell here and that have changed my life as much as you have. In all honesty, I regret not saying something earlier on. Maybe I could’ve gotten to know you better? Well, I don’t know. That’s the funny thing about the past. You don’t know what could have been. But now, living in the present, I know I made the right decision logging onto my laptop…And commenting for the first time. Talking to all of you for the very first time was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made in my life. I couldn’t ask for a //family// better than the one I have here, after all. My past isn’t exactly the best…It’s a little scarred, here and there. Some of you know more than others. But, I’ll admit it. I self-harm, I’ve attempted suicide more times than I can count, and I’ve almost run away from home so many times…I used to refuse to eat, as well. But, you know, I’m proud of my past. I shouldn’t be ashamed. It was my way of coping. I mean, I was once given a few weeks to live at most. But I am here now, with breath in my lungs, a beat in my heart, a glint in my eyes and a smile on my face. Because despite what my past holds, it’s what has made me who I am today. And I am proud of who I am today. No-one can change my opinion of myself, because I am the best person I could ever be. My past may be the home of a demon that haunt me…But that’s the past. That’s no longer here. Now, the future on the other hand…That’s going to be so much brighter than things may seem, right now. I’m going to be smiling, because I’ve found true friendship. I’ve found people that mean more to me than my real family do. I would more than happily risk my life to put even the smallest of smiles on their faces. I love them more than anything in the world. I would do anything I could if it meant I could meet them….Even if it was only for an hour. But I one day hope that I can be there and hug some of you guys and tell you everything is going to get better…Tell you how much I love you. Even some of you that I’ve only recently started talking to- like Kallie and Hellboy (because let’s face it you two are some of the most perfect people I’ve ever known okay! ♥). And to the present…Living in the present is the best way to live. Don’t live in the past because that is just what once was…It’s not coming back. You have to let it go. No matter how good or bad it was, the present will have so many surprises in store for you! The future…That’s for your dreams. The inspiration and motivation to keep you going! When things get tough in the present, remember that the future will be better and you just have to hold on… Time goes by too fast…Don’t let the most precious moments in life slip through your fingers by living in the past or future. Live in the present, because… Yesterday is history, Tomorrow is a mystery, Today is a gift, That’s why it’s called the present. The present is one of the best gifts of all, because I get to share it with each and every one of you! ♥"
Sometimes I wish I could go back. Go back to how things used to be. Back to how things were when everyone was so happy and nice. When things weren't as tough as they are now.
I wish I could go back.
But I know if I did things differently, I'd be missing out on knowing the most wonderful people in this world...